Andare, Partire, Tornare ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Obsessions and confessions Been thinking about SWoop's entry on obsessions, since I'm so chock-full of the damned things myself. I'm obsessed with Italy in general, several books including _Tam Lin_ by Pamela Dean, the Sayers books (including her translations of Dante, which I adore), and anything by Guy Gavriel Kay. Add to that list the Roman Empire (although not to as great an extent - it mostly limits itself to Russell Crowe in Gladiator, and the series of books by Colleen McCullough on The First Man in Rome, plus a long-distance crush on Julius Caesar that was probably fueled by the McCullough books), several lusty men (the exact makeup of the roster shifts occasionally, but always includes Richard Dean Anderson and Kenneth Branagh). There are other ones, some of which have been tossed to the wayside, and there are new ones - I'm always willing to discover something new to obsess about. Occasionally, I wish desperately that I could fall into a novel literally (like the Tuesday Next books, I suppose) and just escape - learn Latin by living in Rome, see what Tolkien's elves really look like, flirt with Lord Peter Wimsey and perhaps have a torrid pre-Harriet affair with him. (Although I'm lousy about fantasizing about my crushes - no matter how much I want to romp with Russell Crowe, I can't picture him standing at the doorway to my bedroom and saying, "Darling, let's have a fling." Probably some of that old lack of self-confidence surfacing again.) This might tie into the occasional weirdity that I fall into - pretending that I'm being observed. Of late, it's been my dear vanished dad, who has cut off the family and gone to live with a woman in Seoul without the forethought to divorce my mom first. That one stems out of a desire to have him *see* my life, and the relative success it's become, and force him to acknowledge that I'm a grown-up now. But sometimes it's a fictional character doing the observing, making notes on 21st century America, and comparing it with what they know. Elaborate scenarios of me explaining modern life, to keep me occupied on the bus. I used to do this even as a kid, when I'd envision the worst happening, and then doing deep thinking about what I'd say, and what I'd do. Obsessions do narrow, as SWooP pointed out, but only if you let them. If you want them to, they can branch out, and lead to other topics of interest. Besides, it adds so much spice, and always gives you something to babble about at a party. Everybody needs somebody or something to love, and that heady flush of excitement is so much fun, don't you think? 8:55 p.m. - 2002-08-27 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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